Depression for someone who doesn’t understand, can be very difficult to explain.
Let me try… I feel like everyone exists inside of this oblivious bubble. They are happy within, and are social and content. Outside the bubble are the world’s problems, politics, fears, social anxiety, etc.
I feel like I have somehow popped through the bubble membrane and am floating in space. I can’t quite communicate with anyone inside, they can’t quite hear me or understand me through the clear sheen of their contentment… and there is no way to poke my way back in… out here, the world is more raw. I feel the horrors of the world and my personal fears are heightened.
Even when I am crying or screaming for help no one can really hear me. Even when I am with others, I am so very alone. When I am with my husband or my son, the loneliness is not so bad. Imagine my son as a light. When he is near, I can peer into the happiness zone and I can cling to him, feeling happiness through him. But when I am not with my son, or my husband, … the moment they let go…I am blocked out again to feel my sorrow at 300%.